October 28, 2022
After two straight quarters of contraction, the U.S. economy grew by 2.6% in the past three months. Team Biden trumpeted the news like they just liberated Europe, while Team Not Biden screamed “We are still in a recession!” Thankfully, with the elections only 11 days away, we can return to ignoring GDP numbers like we usually do.
Gas prices also started to fall slightly across the country, but the hidden news is that diesel prices have not, and really haven’t at all year. That means the cost of all your Amazon and Wayfair packages will still be high because it takes big old trucks to get them there. Therefore, inflation. Because, math.
Oh, we didn’t see you standing there, Mr. Still Uncomfortably High Inflation! Join the fun!
All of this national news seems irrelevant when viewed through the lens of the Phillies going to the World Series, babies! For the first time since 2008, the big show comes to Citizens Bank Park! Grease up those poles, kids!
We usually wait until the end of our festivities to do the Shameless Client Plug, but in this case, the segue is just too perfect. Longtime friend and valued Triad client Joe Ashdale became a viral star when a video of him surfaced from game five of the NLCS, holding his beloved wife Arlene’s mass card to the heavens, where she was no doubt cheering on the Phils! We aren’t crying; you’re crying.
The General Assembly wrapped up its two-year slate of business with a flurry of activity this week. The highlight came when the House, Senate and governor’s office settled on a $2 billion tax-incentive package for the state’s energy, biomedical and dairy industries. For those who say that government can’t do big things anymore, we say balderdash. Largely because it is really fun to say. BALDERDASH, YOU RAPSCALLIONS!
The House GOP brought articles of impeachment against Philadelphia district attorney Larry Krasner. Should the effort succeed in the House, the state Senate would then have to convict him, setting up a very weird dynamic where GOP gubernatorial nominee Doug Mastriano would likely vote not to convict, having already criticized the impeachment effort rather publicly. But there are miles to go before we get to that exit on the surreal highway.
For a complete list of every other bill that was voted this week, we suggest you reach out to Triad’s Noah Logan, who tracked every movement of the legislature like some crazed bloodhound this week. Wait until he wakes up, though; it was a long week.
The state Supreme Court will expedite its review of a lawsuit that aims to prevent undated mail-in ballots from being counted. For those who are keeping score at home, this is the 49th time the courts have been asked to interpret election law in the Keystone State. We guess the upside is that counties will know what the hell is going on when they count ballots, and as an added bonus, it forced us to get caught up on our reading of the 1964 Civil Rights Act’s Materiality Provision, which is a scintillating read.
Emergency teaching permits are all the rage these days, as school districts across Pennsylvania struggle to find teachers. From what we have been able to tell, pretty much every person in the country who goes to school board meetings to scream already believes they are qualified to be teachers anyway, so what the heck? Let ‘em all in.
If you are one of the folks who plan to keep up with your COVID boosters on a yearly basis, those buggers are about to get expensive. When the federal government stops buying them, the Pfizer vaccine will cost $110 per jab. Nothing incentivizes vaccine-hesitant people like charging them a c-note to get stabbed.
President Biden announced he is planning to run for re-election in 2024, and according to the POTUS himself, First Lady Jill Biden is on board with that plan. What he didn’t mention is that he told her of his decision during the Phillies game, and she said “uh-huh, that’s nice honey” without ever taking her eyes off the screen.
Former President Trump is planning a trip to Westmoreland County to rally the faithful for the aforementioned Doug Mastriano and Dr. Oz. Something tells us that the Oz-man, who is currently in a flat-footed tie with John Fetterman in the U.S. Senate race, might just be somewhere else in the state that day.
The long-awaited debate between Oz and Fetterman went off Tuesday night and suffice to say, there were very strong opinions about it. In fact, it was astounding how many people could not wait to get on Twitter and tell you exactly why their candidate wiped the floor with the other guy. We suspect that at least 10% of those people actually watched it.
Speaking of Twitter, Elon Musk now owns it, so prepare yourself for something incredibly weird to happen.
Over on the Triad socials this week, we were thrilled to host the Legislative Black Caucus Foundation reception at our headquarters this week.
A big thank-you goes out to everyone who attended our forum on health care supply-chain issues with our friends at the Healthcare Distribution Alliance.
Our We Can’t Make This Up segment takes us to… Pennsylvania, of all places! It seems as though some tricksters have appropriated the DCNR logo and are posting Bigfoot warnings all over our state parks, prompting DCNR to go on record saying Bigfoot is not real. Sure, DCNR. Uh-huh. Sounds very fishy to us, and we are bringing extra bear mace next time we hit the parks. No way we are gonna be Sasquatch food.
That’s what passes for news around here as the ENTIRE PLANET breathlessly awaits the 2022 General Election. Actually, it just seems that way, because we Americans tend to believe the rest of the world gives a flying blue fig about everything we do. In any case, from all your friends at Team Triad, have a great weekend!